Ai Kawashima, age 21, university student.
Dear Koyu Kinjo,
War survivors and war documentaries always tell me two things. Undesirable deaths and unbelievably strong will to fight for the emperor. Those of who died in suicide missions, who went through a severe pain until they died, and who were trained to have a mentality that killing humans was right, they break my heart. However, your story was different from what I knew about wars. I know that you had a hard time in in the Tekketsu Kinnotai. In the part about after you left it, it seemed to me there was something missing. You never talked about depression. You looked at your town being burned without being scared. You thought the American concentration camp was a boring place. For the first time in my life, I got to know someone who lived the war with such a calm and fearless mind.
What we learn from devastating war stories is limited because we have never experienced war. Knowing the war means that you lived in the war and saw the reality with your own eyes, but all we know is how many people died and who won. We can imagine the fear, pain, and sorrow, but after all, our lives are so peaceful that we can’t really understand what you tell us. It is difficult to keep the war alive without experiencing it. However, your story taught me a thing that will stay in my mind. Something that you never lost.
You never lost yourself. It is often said that wars change humans. It forces you to kill people, to follow the emperor in any situation, and to be proud when your loved one dies in a fight. Everyone speaks, looks, and acts the same way during wars. There is no room to have emotions or personalities that we were born with. However, you were always a stubborn 15-year-old kid, acting without thinking about what would come next. But you never expected things to go negative. You survived because of that.
The way you lived the war changed my perception of it. Maybe it was not all about depression. There must have been people like you or people who lightened up the worst situation with a smile. I should look ahead and never lose my hope because there is no need to be afraid of being shot or being bombed. I will keep your story in my mind.
Sincerely,
Ai Kawashima